In an increasingly polarized world, making space for constructive disagreement is crucial in maintaining community. Unanimity or even consensus is not the goal, but rather preserving — and, if possible, nurturing — relationships. 

Synagogues and nonprofit organizations today face unprecedented challenges in this realm. Siloed news chambers, hyper-polarized politics and increased anxiety among people are just a few reasons why. In addition to the standard agenda items of negotiating clergy contracts, securing rental space and passing a budget, Jewish lay leaders are challenged with the high-stakes responsibilities of issuing official statements and bringing in speakers who some may deem controversial. There is an increased fear of alienating a portion of their membership on political grounds. 

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If institutions want to preserve intra-communal relationships, their leaders must facilitate constructive and issue-based discussions without spiraling into name-calling, demonizing and antagonistic language that is unfortunately so prevalent in modern discourse.

Since 2009, the Pardes Institute of Jewish Studies has examined the world of constructive dialogue through a Jewish lens. With then-faculty member Rabbi Daniel Roth, Pardes students and faculty kicked off a new observance on the 9th of the Hebrew month of Adar in 2013, designating that week a “Week of Constructive Disagreement.” That date marks the day when, around two thousand years ago, healthy disagreements “for the sake of Heaven” between Beit Hillel and Beit Shammai turned destructive, and it serves as a powerful reminder of what can happen when these values and skills are neglected. Roth sought to address the troubling trend of polarization in society. He recognized that the world had become so fraught with suspicion and tension that people had lost interest in talking with those with whom they disagreed. Sometimes engaging with people who held opposing views was perceived as a sign of weakness, or even as an act of betrayal. 

In 2020, this work expanded with the Mahloket Matters Fellowship, which grew out of the Beit Midrash Way, a series of shiurim (lessons) Roth had created with inspiration from Jonathan Haidt’s The Righteous Mind. Through Makholet Matters, we continue to evolve the Jewish lens through which we view, experience and engage with the world. The original 2019 curriculum included lessons titled “Fear War or Trust Peace? From Jacob and Esau through Chamberlain and Menachem Begin to Today” and “‘Fake News’ or Uncovering the Truth? From Joseph and his brothers through Jefferson and Hamilton to Today.” Sefi Kraut, director of Mahloket Matters, along with the growing faculty of Mahloket Matters facilitators, continue to update and enhance the fellowship’s material with timely and relevant topics and tangible takeaway skills. 

One of the program’s current lessons, “Compromise or Truth,” examines both the story of Moses and his negotiations with the leaders of the tribes of Gad and Reuven in Bamidbar 32, and then directs the learner to rabbinic literature to continue the conversation. Predictably consistent with the inconsistencies we find in our sacred texts, we find both advocacy for and advice against compromise in any given situation. For instance, we read that “Rabbi Eliezer ben Rabbi Yossi Haglili said: ‘It is forbidden to reach a compromise, and all who compromise are sinners’”; yet only a few lines later, we find that Rabbi Yehoshua ben Karcha comes to the conclusion “What is a law that contains peace? We can answer: this is a case of compromise“ (Sanhedrin 6b). The session ends with an opportunity for each fellow to assess their own conflict management style. By being aware of one’s inclination towards steadfastness in their opinion or a desire for peace, participants can approach future interactions with an added level of awareness and perspective.

Another new lesson examines how wide our proverbial “tent” can and should be, encouraging us to ask questions about identity, affiliation and ideological uniformity. Prompted by the proliferation of anti-Zionist sentiments after Oct. 7, the lesson “The Big Tent: Where Should We Draw Our Red Lines?” explores how to decide if an individual or viewpoint is unacceptable. The session highlights rabbinic texts that encourage us to accept and welcome the stranger, while also incorporating voices that advocate for removing someone from our midst if their viewpoints are dangerous to the well-being of the community. 

The fellowship strives to provide participants with both a greater level of self-awareness of their own innate biases and the ability to shepherd others through a similar learning experience. Fellows learn how to ask questions and solicit information from others to learn about the personal experiences that were instrumental in forming their opinions. This enables a more constructive, and often more interesting, conversation about an issue. For instance, someone with a liberal approach to immigration may, when prompted, share their family’s experience of having been refugees. Uncovering this detail may not change either’s opinion, but it gives the other party a deeper insight into their thinking. The inquiring party may then shift the conversation to focus on the lived experience of the immigrant rather than focusing only on border security and current citizens. 

Responding to the growing need and demand for skill-building to foster constructive disagreement, this spring Mahloket Matters will offer cohorts designed specifically for board members of synagogues and other Jewish nonprofits, employees of Jewish institutions and community leaders affiliated with Jewish institutions or the wider nonprofit world. Applications are open for the Spring 2025 cohorts.

Holding differing opinions is not new for the Jewish people, and the Mahloket Matters Fellowship brings our textual heritage, social psychology and the issue’s immediate relevance to North American communities, both Jewish and wider. 

Rabbi Monica Kleinman is the assistant director of programs at the Pardes Institute of Jewish Studies.