• Home
  • About
    • About
    • Policies
  • Submissions
    • Op-eds
    • News / Announcements
  • Contact
  • Donate
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

eJewish Philanthropy

Your Jewish Philanthropy Resource

  • News Bits
  • Jewish Education
  • Readers Forum
  • Research
  • Show Search
Hide Search
You are here: Home / Readers Forum / Waking Up and Showing Up for our Jewish Youth of Color – Because our Community is at Stake

Waking Up and Showing Up for our Jewish Youth of Color – Because our Community is at Stake

January 11, 2016 By eJP

Shabbat at Camp Be’chol Lashon; screenshot B'nai B'rith Magazine
Shabbat at Camp Be’chol Lashon; screenshot B’nai B’rith Magazine

By Ilana Kaufman

I was sitting across the very large desk of a nationally respected, executive Jewish organizational leader. I had questions about data and the Jewish organizational ecosystem. He had questions about where I grew up, what compelled me toward working in the Jewish community, and where my daughter attends religious school. As we closed the meeting my colleague stood up, walked across the expanse of his office to a bureau filled with books, journals and framed pictures. He picked up the only picture not facing forward and handed it to me. “This is my grandson,” he said in a quiet, cautious tone.

“He’s amazing! Where is he in religious school?” I asked.

My colleague’s voice cracked.

“It’s complicated.”

More than five times now, nationally regarded Jewish organizational executives have come-out-of-the-closet to me about their family members of color. And when I’ve been able to ask about this hesitance to share, these leaders, despite their significant formal power inside of the mainstream Jewish community, feel powerless and afraid when it comes to race and racism.

*****

When I was twenty years old, my friend Wanjiru and I went to see art at Washington DC’s famed Phillips Collection. By the time we stepped out of the second floor elevator we were greeted by security guards who escorted us to a private room where they searched and checked-in our small bags. The museum was filled with women carrying big bags and purses. They just all happened to be White.

When I told my Mother what happened, she quite literally was on the next train from New York City, and I somehow found myself standing behind her as she sat at a small desk across from the Collection’s executive director. She named the racism and articulated the unacceptable nature of our treatment. I was floored at her power – to convene this meeting, to elegantly dress down an uppity racist. My Mother spent parenthood fighting off the racists. Didn’t matter if they were in a bourgie gallery or in her own Jewish community. Our Ashkenazi family initially eschewed the idea of Black members, which was only partially eased with religious school and rites of passage. It was my faith community and family who taught me the term schvartze. If my Mother wanted to engage in secular or Jewish life, she quite literally carried the gifts and burdens that come with having children of color in White dominated communities deeply informed by racism.

When we left the museum I thanked my Mother for the intervention. As we walked down 21st Street Northwest, she turned to me and said, “It can be subtle or in your face, but only White people know how racist White people can be.”

It is this internal knowledge of the danger of White racism that makes those thinking about resisting it in some way fearful. Never mind the times my Mother had to endure the stories of refused restaurant tables, racist comments at Jewish summer camp and the suggestion that I park my car “in the back,” even though my hosts were expecting me to come through the front entrance. Racism makes you tough, but there is a price to survival. It is also like a slow drippy leak. After time it corrodes the spirit of People of Color, and also wounds the spirit of those White folks who love them. Some White Jewish community leaders with Black and Brown relatives worry about their reputation, and in some way about being seen as having let the community down. They worry about how racist the Jewish community is, and like my Mother, have experience, upon experience observing – sometimes even partaking in racism common in Jewish community life.

While sitting on a panel at the Jewish Council of Public Affairs Townhall discussing the role of Jewish advocacy in 21st Century Social Justice Movements, and race and racism’s effect on the organized Jewish community, one of my colleagues asked the audience of 70 participants (two of whom were non-White) to raise their hands if they have People of Color in their families. Half of the hands in the room went up. When I was teaching in a Northern California Shul on Yom Kippur about Jewish Identity and Racial Justice I asked how many of the 50 all White participants in the room have family members who are non-White. Looking across the room, up went half of the hands. And when I work with my nationally renowned colleagues on how to build enduring, authentic coalitions with communities of color, and I ask them if they have People of Color in their families, with all of the same awkwardness and fear of a coming out Queer adolescent, at least half of them come out about having next generation family of color. And when I asked each of those three audiences how many of those family members of color attend Shul, engage in mainstream Jewish life, or in some way meaningfully connect to the organized Jewish community, not one – not a single person – can say the Jews of Color in their families are connected to any part of the organized Jewish community eco-system.

When I ask what’s keeping the Jewish family of color away, I am told, “It’s complicated,” followed by stories of being made to feel unwelcome because of race. One of my colleagues said, “Here I am in a role where I set national policy, but I can’t get my grandson to come to Shul because last time he went an older White woman kindly suggested he was somehow lost or confused when he was finding our seats. It was subtle, but the subtle experiences add up.” And then he said, “Going to Synagogue is like trying to kill my spirit by 1,000 racist cuts.”

The United States is well on its way to becoming a nation of folks of color. With 20% of our Jewish community already racially and ethnically diverse, non-Observant Jews marrying non-Jews at almost a rate of three out of four, and qualitative data that suggests many Jewish families have next generation family of color, the Jewish community is poised to soon become quite hued, too. And if you want to see the Jewish future – the one where Jews of Color are whole and amazing and thriving – just look at my former intern and Oakland, California’s Youth Poet Laureate, Tova Ricardo. Or consider the two young women of color who, at their recent B’not Mitzvah chanted darn near flawless Trope, delivered a compelling drash on leadership, summonsed the kind of power relegated to moments both extraordinary and holy, and claimed their space in their Shul and in our Jewish community.

On a recent afternoon I sat with Jewish leaders of color talking about our experiences, and the trials and tribulations associated with being of color in mainstream Jewish life. We talked about the youth of color in our community, and while acknowledging some level of acceptance, we noted that the Jewish community has done next to nothing to strategically address racism emanating from within our Jewish community. There are handfuls who are indeed whole and thriving, but the experiences with race for Jewish youth of Color are hardly characterized by rainbows and unicorns. One colleague said, “The ones who thrive are the ones who, when racist things happen, they talk about it. And then their parents come and handle it. Until the rest of our community wakes up and shows up, that’s our obligation as Jewish leaders of Color. We are like community in loco parentis. Because not only do we know how racist our community can be, we know how to thrive.”

So, when that nationally respected, executive Jewish organizational leader I mentioned at the opening explained that his grandson didn’t feel welcome at religious school, I understood exactly what he meant and told him I was sorry. But then, after a reflective pause, I asked, “Don’t you want him to love our community?”

“Of course,” he said.

“Then saying ‘It’s complicated,’ isn’t enough. Too much is at stake.”

Ilana Kaufman is the Jewish Community Relation Council’s Public Affairs and Civic Engagement Director for the East Bay. She lives and brews kombucha in Berkeley, California.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

Filed Under: Readers Forum, The American Jewish Scene

Click here to Email This Post Email This Post to friends or colleagues!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Cynthia R. Darrison says

    January 11, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    I am the mother of an adopted daughter from China. She is a student in a Brooklyn Bais Yaakov. It is not easy and I have had to teach her the difference between questions and taunting. I have also taught her that she is halachicly Jewish, having gone through the conversion process, and no one can take that away from her. She believes that and loves Judaism. But I also have to fight racism – both subtle and overt. We are thankful for supportive family and friends, Shul Rabbis/Rebbetzins and congregants, and the educators of Prospect Park Yeshiva.

  2. Sher rose says

    January 11, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    We need to help people understand that white Jews are the anomaly. Think back to where Jews came from. Think Iraqui, Yemen, Egypt…it just takes a little education. A little disabusing the belief that European painters during the Middle Ages, Renaissance, baroque and Rococo were painting their religious icons accurately. A visit to Israel fixes the notion that our people were one color. And of course we all need to remember the Jewish axiom of welcoming the stranger because we all were strangers in a strange land at one time.

  3. Caroline Kelly says

    January 12, 2016 at 8:40 am

    I live in Los Angeles and even ten years ago had to constantly explain to older members of my congregation how I was Jewish even though my last name was not a typical Jewish last name or that I did not grow up eating lox and gefilte fish. Even in an urban environment, people had a very narrow view of what a Jew looked like and ate and did.

    I’d like to think it is a bit better today, at least in urban environments. I hate the idea of Jews being racist and think instead that they are ignorant. Either way, it must get trying and alienating for Jews of color. I can’t wait for the day that articles like this won’t need to be written because we have embraced how multi-racial and ethnic Jews actually are and can be.

  4. manley kiefer says

    January 14, 2016 at 8:36 pm

    We have to be careful not to become white Jewish supremists. It will only diminish us as Jews. As a persecuted minority in many places we should understand the what Judaism, racism and prejudice is all about.

  5. Peter Margolis says

    January 19, 2016 at 6:29 pm

    For a population that so often congratulates itself on its education and accomplishments, I am always amazed at the provinciality of (many) American Jews.

Primary Sidebar

Join The Conversation

What's the best way to follow important issues affecting the Jewish philanthropic world? Our Daily Update keeps you on top of the latest news, trends and opinions shaping the landscape, providing an invaluable source for inspiration and learning.
Sign Up Now
For Email Marketing you can trust.

Continue The Conversation

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Recent Comments

  • Lyn Light Geller on Being Heard: What We Owe Jewish Community Professionals
  • Sheila Katz on The Unfinished Work of Inclusion
  • Sarah Schuminsky on The Unfinished Work of Inclusion
  • Paul F. Resnick on Toward a Strategic Philanthropic Approach to Field Building
  • michael shire on The Big Jewish Question On My Mind:
    Where Am I Complicit in Perpetuating Bias?

Most Popular Recent Posts

  • BBYO receives historic $25 million Pledge to Support Women’s Leadership and Empowerment
  • Words to Avoid – 2019 Edition
  • Being Heard: What We Owe Jewish Community Professionals
  • Redefining Jewish Education: Federations’ Goals for a New Century
  • Caregiving – The Big Issue No One is Talking About

Categories

Archives

Footer

What We Do

eJewish Philanthropy highlights news, resources and thought pieces on issues facing our Jewish philanthropic world in order to create dialogue and advance the conversation. Learn more.

Top 40 Philanthropy Blogs and Websites to Follow in 2019

Copyright © 2019 · eJewish Philanthropy · All Rights Reserved