The last meal Shani Gabay ever ate with her family was on Oct. 6, 2023. It happened to be her favorite dish, made by her mother — spicy fish stew with challah on the side. The next day, Gabay, a 25-year-old recent law school graduate, went to the Nova music festival with friends. She was murdered at the festival when Hamas infiltrated the party in Israel’s south and slaughtered 364 people.  

On Monday evening, just two weeks before the one-year anniversary of Gabay’s death, a group of about 30 culinary leaders, pro-Israel activists and journalists gathered with Gabay’s mom, Michal Gabay; younger sister Nitzan; and older brother Aviel, (the three were dressed in white t-shirts that read “Team Gabay”) around a long table set with a white tablecloth at the chic French restaurant Gabriel Kreuther, a two-star Michelin restaurant in midtown Manhattan named after its chef and owner, Gabriel Kreuther. 

The four-course meal featured the chef’s take on Gabay’s treasured stew —- with some assistance from Michal in the kitchen. The favorite dishes of other Oct. 7 victims were also served: tomato soup with dumplings in memory of Itay and Hadar Berdichevsky, beef tartare with microgreens in memory of Adiel Twitto, and for dessert chocolate birthday cake in memory of Aviv Baram.  

The inaugural event was hosted by the Asif Culinary Institute, a culinary center in Tel Aviv that has provided thousands of hot meals to Israelis impacted by the Israel-Hamas war. In May, the institute launched an initiative called “A Place at the Table” as a response to the devastating reality that thousands of families in Israel have been left with an empty seat at the dinner table after the Oct. 7 attacks. Asif works closely with the families to gather stories about their loved one before recreating their most-loved meals, often in the families’ own kitchens. Then the recipes and stories are shared on Asif’s website and social media channels in an effort to help the world learn about the victims of the attacks on a personal level. 

Sitting around the table with Gabay’s family on Monday at the invitation-only event were an eclectic mix of attendees, most of whom had never met before but quickly found common ground through food. Guests included Michelle Ahdoot, director of programming and strategy at EndJewHatred; social media influencer Zach Sage Fox; Mosheh Oinounou, former executive producer of “CBS Evening News” and founder of Mo News; and “Everybody Loves Raymond” actress Patricia Heaton.  

“Jewish people need to see that they have allies because everywhere they look they see antisemitism has exploded,” Heaton, who created a nonprofit organization called the October 7th Coalition to help Christians stand with the Jewish people and Israel, told Jewish Insider at the event, adding that she would “like to see more” support from Christians. “And we are trying to help them find ways to express their support. We’d like to see more pastors talking about it in the pulpit and more congregations involved in rallies and marches to support the [101 hostages that remain held in Gaza]. A lot of Christians have been to Israel but they don’t know Jewish people in their own neighborhood.”  

Heaton said that the dinner, which had a celebratory mood despite the tragic circumstances that surrounded it, encapsulated what she has observed of Jews. “You turn sorrow into joy,” she said. “You’re all about life, l’chaim.” 

“Whatever we can offer you as Christians, we want you to know we are on your side to win this battle,” Heaton said. “And it’s beautiful to be together in a battle that involves a two-star Michelin restaurant.” 

Kreuther, the chef, told guests that the evening was about “discovering [that there is] somebody behind recipes.”

“Hearing stories and remembering people,” he continued, noting that he’s observed that people who “love food also love connection.” 

Chico Menashe, CEO of Asif, said that the decision to leave his family in Israel and come to New York for the event while Hezbollah is launching rockets towards northern Israel was a difficult one to make; but ultimately he decided that being there was important. “We have found that there is extreme motivation and need from the families for such a project,” Menashe, who organized the event alongside Naama Shefi, the founder of Asif and the Jewish Food Society, told JI. 

So far, about 30 families have participated in the initiative. “We plan to do this through next year so I assume we will gather potentially hundreds of stories,” Menashe continued, noting that Monday night was the “first and only event we have done” and that the group wants to “get the word out to the United States.” 

The project is the perfect way to memorialize Gabay in particular, for whom food was a central part of life, her family members told guests during the meal. She loved to eat, cook “and to be in fancy restaurants,” Aviel said. At the funeral, Michal recalled, “everyone said they were Shani’s best friend.” Guests also learned about Gabay’s beloved dog, who is now being cared for by her sister, Nitzan. 

Both Michal and Aviel noted that Gabay lived by the motto “no time for drama.” At the same time, they said, she never hesitated to share what was on her mind — no matter how blunt. 

Aviel said that the meal was “delicious.” But “if Shani was here she’d tell the chef to make it more spicy.”